Tough Love

Are you depressed?
Tired?
Unmotivated?
Listless?
In Pain?

Well, get up off your ass , get outta the bed, and
find something to do, anyway. And if you haven't
been doing so, get out of the house.

Fresh air, interaction, accomplishment, mobility, and
change of scenery are requirements for keeping the
demons at bay.

I speak from experience when I say it's an everyday
struggle to keep feelings and circumstance from
doing me in. We can't be ruled by emotion or fears.
Make yourself get up, drill sergeant style.

Whatever it takes to generate movement.
Activity is crucial to feeling better and accomplished.

To start moving is a magical.
Survival begins with refusing defeat.
You don't need a long-term plan to just start moving.

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Who's In Charge of Your Workshop?

As a realist and a cynic, I see things for what they are,
not the feel-good facade often promoted. I see the world
stripped bare of pretense.

Sometimes, that harshness threatens to consume me.

When you're going a spell without work, when having nothing
of value to occupy your mind (or hands,) when questioning your
worth based on the normal tenants of what people in our society
are 'supposed' to have in their lives....things can get rough.

When you're an unemployed person--shifted out of normal
society as we are--separate, detached, lost...you can lose
your grip on the world very easily...and quickly.

We have to work overtime to make sure that doesn't happen.
Any or all of these tips that can help are ways to avoid having
the situation get to you.

*Occupy yourself; keep busy and productive
*Reinforce your best attributes; stop beating yourself up
*Surround yourself with correct things, not negatives
*Keep working on what's important to you
*Don't let yourself go; maintain hygiene and house cleaning
*Keep to a schedule
*Keep working on goals
*Do something body-wise like exercise
*Do something for your mind like learning a new word, language, etc.
*Do something spirit-wise, like meditation
*Do something fun or freeing, like laugh, dance, or draw

You may not feel like doing any of these things, but just as a
job is sometimes a means to a paycheck, sometimes in life we
have to do the groundwork for a better outcome, even when we
don't feel motivated.

Make taking care of yourself your new full-time job.

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Sunday is a Day of Re-Set

Keep working at it; keep battling.

No concern for resistance, no attention to past losses.

A man--a person--is not a cumulative effort of losses.

Losses are things that happen, inevitable, normal.

Don't lose perspective because you're in the midst of one now.

Regain that moxy and verve.

Don't accept a secondary position of value in your mind.

Don't let the opinions and condescension of others alter your self-concept.

Be strong, motivated, proud, audacious.

Don't let the emotions lead you.

Feel them...without being controlled or led by them.

YOU CAN DO THIS.

***

"I´m Still Standing"covered by André Fuckert

Gary Allan - "Every Storm Runs Out Of Rain"

No matter how committed you are, there are days when you wake up
and just "aren't feeling it."

When you think "Why bother?" and bemoan your self-diagnosed
terminal condition of "Nothing is ever going to change, no matter what I do!"
And those are the days where you have to make yourself do it,
despite the feeling lacking.

When you have to remember whatever inspires you, like maybe
the words to a good song, and hold it closer.

"Feel the apathy, and DO IT anyway!"

Get up. Get moving. Get active and stay that way.

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Multi-Purpose Distractions

One of the great things I have found to serve as distraction/hobby is growing
my own garden. Not a small feat for someone with Zero experience in
such an endeavor nor a smidge of patience. But it did, excuse the pun, grow
on me.

Gardening has been a multi-purpose delight, offering me a distraction from
my troubles as it keeps my mind engaged and let's time wile away....as well
as providing a tremendous therapeutic release. It's also heartening to see the
fruits of your efforts appear and be of use...once again making me feel productive
and capable. And finally, it's a tremendously beneficial cost-saving measure...
and insurance that your diet will consist of fresh and healthy items!

You can do a makeshift greenhouse out of pretty much any space, or convert
a window-filled room of a house into a greenhouse. If you're especially handy
you can build a small greenhouse from predominantly recycled/reused materials
for next to nothing and in no time. The plastic sheeting would be the most costly
piece. (Free blueprints are available online!)

Here are some of the easy ways to get started, as well as benefits of doing it:

* Fresh fruits and vegetables, fewer trips to store, and without pesticides.

*Economical: Seeds can be purchased at the end of season (summer
   especially) from stores like Dollar General for 90% off--anywhere
   from .03 to .05 cents total.  (A great many of my plants I started from
   seeds I saved from product we ate; peppers, scallions, tomatoes, etc.)
   
* Same for soil and manure, marked down and affordable at end of season
   for stores who don't carry year round. You can also find piles of unused dirt
   and soil all over; generally folks will let you have it if you ask. See below
   for my recipe for soil prep.

* Easy: Not much space required, not a whole lot of time needed. Keep it
   small and simple until you get the hang of it. With indoor gardening, you
   don't have the animals to contend with, your crop will grow any time, and
   the weather is not a concern.

* It's about results, not aesthetics. Your shelves and planters can be made
   from scrap wood, plastic trays, reused garden trays, tomato boxes from
   the store, or whatever else you have on hand or pick up on the road. Soil
   can be mixed in used buckets, storage totes missing their lids, etc. Be creative.

* Environmental/Inexpensive: Recycle/refurbish/repurpose ANYthing!
  Other pots, trays, buckets, egg cartons for seedlings, plastic bottles to
   fill out the bottoms of large planters, newspaper for water absorption,
   milk jugs for watering cans, metal cans for small planters, and so on.
   You do not have to spend a lot of money to have an effective garden.

* Even the least handy handy-man can put together wooden gardening
   trays or basic simple shelves for your plants to be leveled and save
   on room.

* Anyone can do it. I had no experience, and I just tried some common
   sense things, learned by trial and error, consulted a few websites, and
   read a few books.
 
* Reduce household waste; Start a bin for refuse compost. Everything
   from coffee grinds to egg shells to ashes from fireplaces can be used
   in a garden. I till my compost in directly to the soil I use for new plants,
   letting it decompose while the seeds grow. Less bugs and smell this way,
   as well as work.

* Therapeutic: Something of your own, a space of your own, relaxing and
   a great time-passer with results to show. You're providing your own food,
   accomplishing something, saving money, and being productive.

You can even turn a profit if you have a buyer for excess, or barter your
overage with other folks who have things you need.

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Here's my recipe for effective and awesome soil mix for new plants:

-30% top soil
-30% manure/Black Cow
-20% regular dirt from the yard, even clay or bad growing dirt
- 5% mulched leaves
- 5% per lite (water retention)
- 5% ashes; fireplace, burn pile, charcoal grill
- 5% compost material (Note; freeze your compost discards all along in a
   large Ziploc, then crush it apart and mix it in when making soil mixture in
   a large tub. Freezing will keep it from stinking until you have enough.)

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My method for prepping a tray/box for seeds/new plants:

1st layer/base: Put some cardboard at the bottom to absorb excess water.
   (Use anything such as food boxes or delivery boxes cut down.)
2nd layer; Plastic bottom; can be saved bags that top soil came in, what-
   ever works. I use the 'cat litter sifter bags' from the dollar store that fill
   the base of the tray and yet have small holes in them for water drainage.
3rd layer; Leaves to provide water-retaining base and extra mulch.
4th layer; crumpled up newspaper
5th layer; Lots of your already mixed batch of soil, patted firm.

Dig a small hole for seeds, place cover dirt lightly over and water.

Good luck, and feel free to ask if you have any questions!
I'll share more tips as I go.

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Sometimes it seems as if making multiple calls, never receiving
a straight answer, being ignored, and getting the runaround
are all 'job requirements' of my unemployment.

It's not uncommon to have folks be openly hostile, or never
return a call, a letter, or e-mail ever.

I'm already stressed and depressed and fighting  hard to keep my calm.
I certainly don't need condescending or incompetent or
indifferent folks (usually it's 'all of the above') treating me as
though I am a distraction to their day, when in fact they are
receiving a paycheck for providing me assistance. (Or rather,
they're receiving a paycheck for maintaining the illusion that they
are there to provide me with assistance.)

In a small town, you have a lot of 'gatekeepers' who get just a
little bit full of themselves, drunk on the power of whether or
not messages get delivered, resume's get handed in, etc. They start
to think their shit doesn't stink, and, furthermore, that you ought to
act accordingly.

Too bad there's no paycheck for dealing with all this circus, because
it's for damned sure hard work!

I am not, nor have I ever been, someone who is a people person.

I don't 'do' (mostly because I'm no good at it) the glad-handing,
baby-kissing, fake-ass manipulation of people that seems a necessity
for finding, getting, and maintaining even the most pedestrian of jobs.

Yet it isn't the public I have trouble with; it's the staff. The secretaries, the
coworkers, the managers, the owners; the folks who need to have their
assholes polished with other peoples' tongues in order for them to act
halfway right.

Then there's the nonsense factor that cultural and regional issues can
interfere with how folks act; no matter how sweet and kindly and pro-
fessional you are, some things like race, sex, age, sexuality, etc. are
not cottoned to by others, and your workplace experience will be an
uphill climb. Your personal business affects your job, even if you are
not the one to introduce it!
(Most people just can't get comfortable with someone that doesn't look,
act, or speak exactly like them.)

Yup, jobs are all about bureaucracy, bullshit, back-stabbing, bullying...
It's life. It's designed to break you; Don't let it.

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